lovemyday

Hi,

Read a little of “The bridge across forever”. A bit about- Grid theory, little about a ship which desappered back in feb, then a few lines from another book.I liked them all, they love me too, we know each other, they make be smile, loved the time. I didn’t think much about the room. I just fell to sleep( My terrace door open).

It was yesterday night. Today! well i could see the effect of open door. I woke up at 0600 Hrs. It was cold, I thought may be i am cold, may be a fever. I again fell back to sleep, only to realize i will again have to race against minutes.

Its wierd! But i can bath and get fresh within a few minutes. I did so. Its not too different from my life but the one dangerous thing that generally happens to me due to this is, i don’t get to have my morning tea. It means i will be thinking a lot, whole day on a lot many things. ( Tea is the magic potion that transits me from one life to another). I will be living two lives today whole day.

Thank to God! today is sunday, that means none of the managers will be there from any of the departments. All the cocks and dogs will at least, not be on my site. But today is last month of the day, it means minimum field work today, we are fast creatures, we work so fast that by the time month ends, we have already finished everything. Well it just means, we will be doing, paperwork. I don’t like it too much.

I was not ready to start work today. I was a little scared and not ok. The seas were more violent then yesterday. There was no sun whole day, and it was cold. i did not anticipate it, what i did not anticipate, we will not be doing any new crane maintainence, only an STP!! that means i will be repairing a couple of pumps and blowers and pipelines.
“No! you are just supposed to guide the guys”.
You go and get the readings for the day.

It meant i was now climbing over 12 monsters whole day and taking reading! Just taking readings.( Not actually! i took only 2 hrs to do the job, i had been doing it for last odd 5 months), Plus i was supposed to guide 2 more technicians for doing maintainence of engine platforms.

OK, i will do it.

I did it, but i was not in my head. I just had no head at my place. I did all that was told but i did it slow.

I felt, i should be asking for half day today.
” you are already taking one since wednesday”
“You have survived a leave longer then 2 days”
” that too when you were travelling for 1 whole day” I was laughing and little frustrated.

They were right, i find myself struggling for life among masses or at home.
Why am i so upset today? I am in a very bad mood. Not able to work.

Dada used to say-”you are lazy”
Krups -you just go back to work, don’t waste my time again.

Sla - It happens to me too.
Mukesh -You are wierd, that’s why.

I was not relieved. I wanted the day to end and go back to my room and hide. I didn’t ask for a leave.
Hari is watching. Yesterday, you misarranged the docs. Its not good you know.
Huh! I am sorry, let me correct it.
I am submerged in a squad of files correcting what i did wrong.

Then again, i am feeling bad. I just can’t work. I tried to connect to internet, bad connection.

A squad of VVIP cars starts making enterance in our plant, get a call from a fellow, come out. there are VIPs visiting.
I come out, watch a full buzz of vehicles passing me by.

Who are they!
Collector, Police officers, Navy officials, MPs, port security officers.
Inspecting now! i start grinning, a black car with a navy dress crosses over.

Militants blow up mumbai. And now they start thinking.

You are not wearing your helmet!
I am only outside cabin.
No excuse right now!
Oops? i go back and get it on. In time, last one of safety. I give a smile to parmar.
The area is silent again.

Tried to help in doing today’s Work logs. Messed it up a bit, but finished it up.
My handover had only some handshakes and i was ready to return back home.

I ask Ajay-anything new about the blasts.
Union home minister has resigned.
Sieze is over.

Bus starts moving.
Hari is not there, I say stop. Somebody said- Go.
He stops after a 50 meters or so, i find hari running for the bus.

Whats the hurry, huh?
I was at the bottom of my hearts- everyone wants to go back home.

How do you except jaydeep to work if i don’t hand him over properly.
I kick my senses up and realize that he has been frustrated due to my behavior today and yesterday, whole day. And he is hiding- how furious he is.

I settle down-tried to stop him!
Nobody listens. Bus moves over. I am on the height of depression, God! don’t declare me a failure again.

Would you like to read the news.
A smile- let’s see.

I try to switch on NDTV, connection fails with the OK button in front. 5 minutes. I try to switch on BBC. We start reading.

Can you really read so fast!
Huh! what! I am sorry. You can read it, hari. I really didn’t realize.

I am back to my room, do a little practice. Dinner. And by luck i am late! and a guy is watching “Behind Enemy lines”. Its english atleast!

I come back take presleep snacks, I think its ok to have a bad day. I need to make it good. Nigeria there are 200 dead by now. Riots are said to be over but unofficial sources say, hundreds have died.

Its thundering out in the skies. Its raining. Winds are high. I tell my ghosts. I understand you, i know i am in trouble, understand what you are suggesting. But you know what pops! Freedom. I still have it.

I decide to stay up for the night, doze to sleep.

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